rock.steady. (hecatehatesthat) wrote in sane_ichiruki,
rock.steady.
hecatehatesthat
sane_ichiruki

The Long-Awaited...

Fic Pet Peeves List!

(Please remember that I have been compiling this list as I encountered things that bug me, and am thus generally in a state of high frustration when I add things to it.  So the tone is not the nicest.  If you've done some of the things on the list, don't cry -- I've done some of them too.  Probably everyone has.  Sometimes we even do them with good reason.  But please do stop and think about why you did/wrote what you did, and whether you could change it.)
  • Pronoun fear makes Ichigo cry.  For the love of KT, STOP referring to Ichigo as "the orange-haired boy/shinigami," "the redhead," "the flame-haired boy" and all other variations that refer to him by his hair, his age, or his job.  Same goes for Rukia (if I read the phrase "the petite shinigami" one more time someone is gonna die) and everyone else.  Seriously.  STOP IT.  The character's name and the pronouns "he" and "she" exist for a reason.  Use them!
  • Never post fic that hasn't been beta read.  And if your beta says it's perfect?  You need a new beta.
  • Orihime is an airhead, not an idiot – yes, there is a difference.
  • If your Rukia is crying, she better have a REALLY DAMN GOOD REASON.  Which means it probably involves death.  If your ICHIGO is crying, he better be nine years old and holding his mother's dead body on his lap.
  • Rukia. Chose. To. Stay. In. Soul Society. Of her own. Free. Will.  She did not regret it and she did not spend her time there pining for Ichigo.  Get over it.
  • Related: Rukia is not going to just give up living in Soul Society and become Ichigo's happy housewife, kthxbai.
  • Ichigo's sexual experience is ZERO and he is certainly not going to be the aggressor with Rukia.  Remember boobfear?  The boy embarrasses easily.  Coax him.
  • From the beginning of the Soul Society arc – around when Byakuya pwns Ichigo and takes Rukia – onward, Ichigo is 16, not 15.  I know we all love the pun, KT included, but birthdays happen, and the pun is technically one-five, not fifteen, anyway.
  • Symbolism is only symbolism when it's subtle.  When it's the only thing in your fic it's what we call an anvil and it's just annoying.
  • Corollary: incomprehensibility does not make your fic le artistique or poetic or whatever you think it is – it makes it pretentious and impossible to read. (Get a beta!  SERIOUSLY.)
  • Please, please read your fic out loud.  If you are stumbling over your sentences?  So am I.  They sound weird.  Make them simpler.
  • Your imagery is cliché and overdone.  No, really, it is.  The black butterfly?  Uh-huh.  BORED NOW.
  • No seriously, Rukia is not a beautiful butterfly.
  • ministration: (chiefly formal or humorous): 1. The provision of assistance or care; the kitchen made spotless by the ministrations of a cleaning lady. 2.  The services of a minister of religion or of a religious institution.  i.e. THIS IS NOT A SEXY WORD.  STOP USING IT IN YOUR SMUT.
  • bemused =/= amused; bemused = confused
  • "in lieu" means in place of, not in light of
  • you do not look in askance, you just look askance, okay?  It's not an emotion, it's an expression, and it's only sort of that – it's a skeptical, scandalized, sideways sort of look.
Feel free disagree  (or agree!) with me about some of these items -- and to say so!  I'd love to discuss fic and fanon and writing in general.  And of course, if you have a pet peeve of your own that I missed, comment with it!
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